est. April 8, 1998, a Solar Birthday

It's my birthday & I've got something to get off my chest that is personal (in a not weird way).

This morning I slept in, made a cup of coffee, responded to a few birthday wishes, & played around with my tarot deck. During this time, I decided to listen to some music. The first song that came on was Tell It To My Heart by Taylor Dayne. It caught me off guard for several reasons 1) my mother has been on my mind, as she usually is when my birthday approaches, 2) Taylor Dayne is a one-hit-wonder artist, & 3) wondering if I like this song b/c I am named after the artist or is it actually good?

(I think it's actually good, honestly.)

What I'd like to focus on is the No. 2, Taylor Dayne being a one-hit-wonder artist because that has stuck with me for a long time. However, I didn't realize how it had affected me until today while listening to the song & a weird thought popped into my head: being named after a one-hit-wonder must mean that I am destined to do at least one good thing... right?

So, listen, what the fuck am I talking about? After this thought, I became irritated with myself because I've done several good things in my life, thus far.

The issue, I realize, is how subjective the word "good" is, right? The Webster definition reads as follows: Good (adj): of a favorable character or tendency, Good (n): something comforting to the moral order of the universe, Good (a): well.

What you (per se) believe or feel is good will almost always be different than what I believe or feel is good; that's human nature. So when I say that I have done good things in my life you might not agree that those are good things b/c of one reason or another. However, I guess, I define "Good" as something that can benefit you while benefiting others & feeds your moral path in life. Is that just as confusing & wordy as the Webster definitions, maybe?

Moving on, after realizing that I have done several good things in my life & that people who weren't celebrities couldn't be one-hit-wonders I decided to pull a tarot card.

(Side Note: the deck I use is called the Starchild Tarot & it does have more cards than a traditional deck & some of the cards have been renamed- that being said I don't know what card this one directly translates to in a traditional desk. Sorry in advance- feel free to look up the desk!)

The card that I pulled was the Akashic Records, it's a part of the deck's major arcana portion, the 22nd card specifically. ANYWAYS.... before pulling a card I always become nervous b/c you might pull a card that would ruin your day- depending on your headspace at that time. But, right before this, I had experienced a mini breakthrough about not letting the outside world's perspective affect my own view of my life or my future.

The Akashic Records card: When we learn that we are in fact co-creators of our own relalities we are accessing the most optimal vibrations of potential experiences available to us and are effectively working with the Akashic Records. When we talk about connecting with our "Higher Self", we are also describing an understanding of our own Akhasic Records. We can connect with this source of loving information in order to be the best versions of ourselves.

The Akashic Records are a sort of library where all emotions, actions, thoughts, words, & experiences are imprinted in an energetic matrix. Think along the idea of the Book of Life or the Tree of Life, a collection of mythic knowledge of the universe.

Dude, what a card to pull on your birthday after finally recognizing a long-overdue self-image issue & (if you're an astrology girlie) the day of the Solar Eclipse. To top that, it cannot be a coincidence that it's essentially the library card of the Universe & I'm working towards becoming a librarian.

Let's quickly address the Solar Eclipse & the WILD people who think the world is going to end for one reason or another. Firstly, we have Solar Eclipses quite regularly, granted not all of them fall in the viewpoint of the United States (where I am writing) but, for Earth, this isn't new, strange, or something to worry about. Is it exciting? Yes! Not everyone gets a chance to see these events- I won't even though it will be visible in my home state of Ohio (which is interesting, imo). Secondly, the world isn't going to end & I feel like I should say sorry (?) b/c I feel like certain people want the world to end.

Regardless, I don't believe I need to "cope" with having a Solar Eclipse on my birthday, as I've read that I should. Weird. Certain events are often tied to having an Eclipse happen on your birthday such as "your next year will be full of health crises" or "get ready to have to rebuild your entire identity if the Eclipse happens on your birthday", & my personal favorite "why you should purchase portal toilets for the Eclipse".

Honestly, I find it really cool that the Sun, Moon, & Earth are all present for my birthday. No, I'm not special & this has happened to several people before me & will continue to happen. However, shut up. Solar Eclipses themselves are generally neutral in their meaning, to simplify what they represent is change- which I welcome gladly. Change is growth & growth is needed when you desire more out of life & when you strive to be & do more. Which I do.

Birthdays are weird, in general. All I want for this birthday is to spend it surrounded by people who care about me, love me as I come, encourage my growth, & are always down to grab a little snack. B/c I'm always snacking. I'm in a place in life where things are changing more so than staying the same, change is hard for me (as it is for anyone) but the people in my life have made it easier to cope with. Change can be frightening but it can also be exciting, I don't know what the next chapters of my life entail but I have a couple wishes, a few dreams, & one hope. To be content with the life I've created.

&, since it is my birthday, promise me you'll buy yourself a little treat! I know I will be buying one today, don't let me do it alone.

Until Next Time,

Haunted Lore xoxo